Yearend Letter from fg, 1971

2a.m.  11 DEC. 71  SAT

Dearest,

       I’m a little late writing and I’ll explain.  Art and Dave made me agree to go out w/ them.  On our way, they kept on kidding me that they would take me to a burlesque [probably the more common term nowadays is ’striptease’.–epd].  Since I know Dave to be responsible as he is married and Art to be thoughtful enough not to drag me to an aimless recreation, so I went along.  We first proceeded to Art’s house to drop his car as we decided only to use one car, Dave’s.  Then at Art’s home, the whole set up got clear to me: the two were only taking me to have a dinner of pizza and a bottle of beer at Fonzo Pizza near my place.  And they had another surprise: Dave has a color TV and his black-and-white TV had broken down and lying idly.  Art had proposed to have it repaired and then to be lent to me.  So the whole thing had been a touching and innocuous outing. We drove to Fonzo Pizza w/c is a cozy and decent cocktail bar, ate pizza and drank a bottle of Schmidt, talked about rats and researches, and drove to my apt., w/ the TV.  Now I have a TV set w/c I can use until I leave.

       Dave saw your photo and the kids’.  He said you are pretty.  He thought Buch looks like me.  It is always nice, perhaps vain, to hear from other men a compliment about the looks of one’s wife.  It gives him the feeling that in a world of men, he is among the successful.  So in this vain sense, Fruc’s endeavors are not meaningless.  Art did not comment, perhaps as a bachelor he thought it was out of place to say the same thing.

       While they were here, we had the TV on, but I turned it off when they left.  I was giddy and sleepy on account of the bottle of beer and of the fact that I only had 3.5 hrs sleep last night, from 5:30 to 9:00 a.m.  So I slept as soon as they left, from 10 p.m. to 12 p.m., after w/c I prepared my supper as I felt hungry.  The pizza must have been digested by midnight. 

       I don’t need a TV as I have no time for it, except perhaps for news and basketball once in a while, and I don’t miss it.  But it is very nice of Art and Dave to go out of their way to think of my leisure.  They think I ought to have entertainment at home since I don’t go out on week nights or Saturday.

       The TV is as big as ours and an RCA Victor brand [this used to be the best and most expensive brand.– epd].  It is pretty clear enough.   But w/o boxing being televised at all here, I really can’t use it often.  I shall rather listen to classical music on Sun. mornings as usual.

       Tomorrow I may not be able to write you as I need the time to write a second paper for Developmental, w/c is due on Monday, the 13th.  After that I have another paper for Physiol., w/c will be due on the 20th.  My progress will be on the 29th and 30th.  You can thus feel that I am a little anxious & disorganized.  The paper w/c I typed last week and w/c I discussed on the 6th, Monday, was called “the hottest in the class” by one of my classmates.  The prof. was also satisfied quite a bit. 

       Today I mailed you and Ima X’mas cards w/ $5 each. [actually, fg was sending me a monthly allowance in addition to the family allowance that UP gave us, so these token amounts were just for fun. — epd]  I hope you don’t mind the equality.  You see, I first inserted a $1 in Ima’s card and 5 in yours, then sealed the envelops.  Before I was able to mail them, I got your Nov. 26th air-letter.  After having read it I got sorry for Ima, so I w/drew $5 from my account w/c is a fresh bill & exchanged it for the dollar.  This explains the fact that her envelop looks pried open and her bill is much fresher than yours.  I am beholden to you for being nice to Ima, not because she’s my mother.  You know that when one is already old and independent he can regard his parents as others.  He does not miss them.  [I’m aware this is one of fg’s tongue-in-cheek statements.  I knew for a fact he loved his mother deeply and missed her very much. — epd]  So my thoughts for Ima are qualitatively like those for Mang Ipe, Lola Teresa, Lola, Mang Aga, etc..  But I can sympathize w/ her bad luck.  She was born posthumous to her father, orphaned at 6 mos. from her mother, w/o a brother or sister w/ whom to have spent a normal life, and widowed at 44.  Now we are all grown up and do not need her as we can now earn our bread and butter and she has no money to bribe us for our affection.  At such a state, Ima does not have to be our mother for us to sympathize w/ her.  I am not even anxious that the like may happen to you as I won’t let it.  It is simply that she deserves some sympathy.  Besides, it was really ambitious and foresightful of her to to have persevered to send me to school.  

       For all this, I am really beholden to you.  Ima can now see that even in my choice of wife, not only in the light of a career, that her sacrifice was worth it and rewarded.  You don’t know how much grateful I feel of you and how much my love for you is intensified more for the care you extend to Ima.  But at the same time, don’t sacrifice unnecessarily.  I am also on your side, as I know you can be reasonable. 

       Inay [my mother — epd]  sent me a pretty X’mas card, acknowledging at the same time the denture stuff.  [My father had requested for Cushion-Grip from fg, for his dentures. — epd]   By all means, don’t accept any reimbursement.  If you will, you will insult me and run against my frame of mind.  Inay also said something about the cards you and I sent to Lola.  (Discreetly, inquire if the moolah in Lola’s card was found.)  On Tuesday perhaps, I’ll send a card to Inay and Tatay & also a $5 for their X’mas.  [I’m always amazed at fg’s generosity which he was only able to indulge in because of his frugality.  He only had a supplementary fellowship allowance at the time, but he sent me about half, drawing on the other half for his own needs.  Inspite of these, he was even able to send me, my relatives and his, token amounts from time to time, amounts he could have used to make his life less stringent.  Even so, I know of no other person to whom giving to others was done happily. — epd]

             Take care.  Don’t worry about the style of your letters.  Even I am overwhelmed by Fruc once in a while.  So are his profs. and classmates.  He makes others anxious at times for his brilliance.  But brilliance is not all.  It is only one of the innumerable traits useful for survival, just like muscles, beauty, cunning, voice, etc..  Rest assured I don’t mean it when I kid you about a lot of things.  When I do, I only express to reassure my rupturing or breaking confidence about the fact that I am the best that you deserve.  I am not that sure.  At times I feel, T___ or R___, B______ or B____, etc. can have given you more.  Then I reassure myself w/ my teasing of you.  If others will say so, I won’t agree w/ them but will do everything to prove them wrong, but I am not that self-assured anyhow.  One thing I am sure of is I love you, esp. now.       Love,        fg-